Away

I want to go away for a while. I want to get lost. I want to go into the wilderness. I want to go where there are no people, and no mothers, and no coworkers trying too hard to cheer me up. I want to go somewhere there are trees and birds and streams. I want to go high in the mountains and look back on the city lights and know that no one knows where I am. I want to be forced to be with myself and only myself. I want to have a real reason for feeling so alone. I want to sit in nature and be swept away by it. I want nothing but the sun and the dirt and the clouds and the flowers. I want to draw pictures of it. I want to sleep for the rest of my life. I want to take a long drink. A long swim. I want to hover below the surface and feel the density of the water pressing in on my body. I want to see everything through the bending brightness of the waves between me and the sky. I want to forget which way I came from and not care where I go next. I want to remember myself. And forget about everything else. I want to be free.