Jessica Dawn Shane

is my favorite person.

I hope that she doesn't mind me dedicating this post to her, especially since I am naming her by her very name, but in all seriousness I love this woman to the moon and back again. Jessica has been my sister for nearly nineteen years now and we have definitely been through our share of downs and outs, but in the past few years I feel like I have grown closer to her than almost every other person on this green earth. Jessica is a knockout stunner, so beautiful, and yet so at home in her own skin. She's unique and quirky and unpredictable, quick and sharp and blunt. She says exactly what she means and never takes it back, never makes excuses, but most of the time she doesn't do it with her words. I love the way that she can convey an entire thought process or emotion just with the tiniest expressions on her face. She doesn't talk just to talk, she says everything deliberately and leaves out the fluff. Jessica has always amazed me with her ability to downplay any situation. Over-dramatizations have never suited her and she doesn't tolerate them from others either. She likes things clean, and concise, and to the point. A very effective way to communicate. Jessica has a gift for shutting people up. It is something to behold.
Growing up, Jessica tended to avoid drawing attention to herself. She took care of herself and she kept to herself, and she was pretty good at getting away with that without anyone really even noticing. In all of the pictures of the three oldest girls as kids we have very personality-specific expressions on our faces. Kira is the kooky one always coloring (and/or living) outside of the lines, creating her own versions of things. I'm the one with a smile plastered on, trying so hard to look right and do things just the right way. And Jessica is always turned slightly away from the camera with a look of annoyance on her face as if she's saying, "Why are you wasting my time with this, I have better things to do." When we were teenagers I feel like I was a constant annoyance to her with all my talk about the boys I liked and my little dramas with that (probably even more so now than then even, sadly), but she never seemed to have any boy troubles of her own to complain about. While I was off chasing one classmate or another, or bumming myself out because the right boy wasn't chasing me back, Jessica was happily doing her own thing and secretly scoffing at the scene because she already knew that none of them were even worth it, and certainly none of them were good enough for her to get so worked up over.
As we've grown and matured, however, I think we may have at least begun to strike a balance in this if in no other way than our conversation. Jessica teaches me to give up my temper tantrums and just live for real. I feel like she's years smarter than me sometimes and I often forget that we're not the same age, or that she's not actually the older sister. Every time I go away I realize more and more how much I miss her and how close of a friend she really is to me. Despite her desire to cut out the excess, she is such a good listener and always has good advice. She puts up with me in all my shortcomings and somehow manages to make me realize that I have nothing to complain about. That we are sisters, and we are friends, and all the other things in life are going to have their time and then they'll be done. And we'll still be sisters, and we'll still be friends.
Jessica has this effortless sense of style. Even with a wardrobe that is too many years old, she still manages to look exactly how she wants to and get me all green over it. She knows what she likes, she knows what works, and she makes it happen. This may mean trying on fourteen different things before she settles on one outfit, but still. When I'm hanging out with her, I'm pretty much sure it makes me a cooler person. I think I'm always basically trying to be like her, and hoping she won't realize it and call my bluff. She is my role model. My best friend. My confidante. My sister. I love you so much Little Jessica. Kiss kiss!!